parallels and juxtapositions

what shall i name you? ever have you been close by.
in the sky, and in soil, in parched sod and in mud,
over the treetops and by the roots and fallen leaves,
and yea, even in the season of spring when all is reborn, have i felt your breath.
you have taught me patience, and have taken away the ability to wait.
you have brought me wisdom and erased my knowledge.
you have exemplified love and obliterated my hope.
you have tortured me till i crave you and listen for your voice in all things.
the insights you gave with one hand, you took away with the other.
you promised intensity but delivered boredom in abundance.
you seemed transparent at a distance, but became opaque chaos close up.
your invitations, though alluring, lead to empty tables and silent halls.
yet you never left me, never faltered by my side.
you taught me the value of peace and freedom.
you showed me how mercy acts.
what name shall i bestow upon you, my inseparable companion, the thorn in my side?
when you are neither more nor less, but what you are-
pain.

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